Welcome to Rate Your Date

Are you in a relationship?  Do you have a “funny” track record around dating?  This worksheet and accompanying course is a person-to-person relationship assessment bringing together several different methodologies to see if this relationship is a good fit (or figure out why a past relationship didn’t work as well as you liked it to). This can be used on current relationships to see how things are lining up with what you want AND past relationships to identify what might have been “off” in your dating past.

 

  The Rate Your Date Worksheet!

 

  Let’s discuss this worksheet!  Why it was created!

I have done this step many different ways … being strong … ignoring what happened … although, I’ll have to admit that the best way to go through this is when I group 100% of my sadness in one 24 hour period. Simply be sad about the end of a relationship – 100% – “all in” sadness. I am lucky to be able to work from home and stay in bed the whole day! If you can’t do that – I recommend that you take a sick day and just wallow in sadness. Owning your sadness helps push through your sadness.  There is a world of thought that being immersed in sadness – helps expedite the completion process. Listen to and meditate to our Guided Imagery.

Guided Imagery Audio

 

  All About Chemistry

Let’s discuss chemistry!

 

  Step #3: Clear Your Space and Your Self

This one is new to me … and I now swear by it! I started with clearing out the space around me by diffusing some essential oils – I started with Clary Sage (for cleaning out the space), then added White Angelica (for protection), then added Valor (for courage) – seemed like a good scent mix … let that run in my diffuser for DAYS! Then, one of my friends who is a Reiki Practitioner mentioned that I should dry brush, AND THEN I remembered that there was a shower version of “washing that man right out of your hair”! That really really really helped – crazy, I know! I did the dry brushing version, as well as, the shower negative energy away.  I highly recommend both – here are directions. How to Dry Brush. How to Wash that Person Right Out of Your Life.

 

  Step #4: Take Time to Heal Your Heart

Whatever you do for self care – do that. If self care isn’t your thing, here are a few ideas: get a massage or Reiki session; go to the gym, for a run or work off some of that energy; or go to yoga and get Zen again. One of the things that makes me feel better is going to fund-raisers and benefits – taking your focus off of yourself and thinking about contributing to others, getting you get to mingle again — are all helpful ways to continue the process of healing your heart.

 

  Step #5: Read Rejection Article (twice, maybe three times)

This article showed up on my Facebook Feed at exactly the right time! Read it numerous times! It sinks in the more you read it. 

Read article here.

The greatest, yet most obvious point about rejection …

We do this type of thing a lot, don’t we? How many times have we refused to see we’re being rejected, no matter how obvious?

 

  Step #6: Get Present to How Amazing and Delicious You Are!

When I was broken up with — he took a few verbal cheap shots before I walked away.  Somehow, those last few hurtful statements, as well as, my own insecurities continue to resonate in my brain space. It takes “something” to get both your own and other people’s negative thoughts out of your head. Take some time to journal and write down all of your good characteristics. Really “get” that what anyone says is more about them than about you!  Fill out the Awesome Me Worksheet.

 

  Step #7: Get Present to What Did Not Work

When breakups happen – we often think a great deal about the good that happened during the relationship. We are not going to do that – we are going to think of the gaps, what was missing, what you didn’t like, and really look at why one or the other of you moved on!  Write yourself a list of the things you overlooked and get judge-y about what you didn’t like.  Then think about how easy it is to find those things in someone else! Why he sucks and I should forgive him worksheet.

 

  Step #8: Develop Your Dating Game Plan

Time is of the essence, we only have 60-100 years to live in this life and we are going to make every minute of it AWESOME! This is a wallowing free zone! First, scrub up your public game: BE GORGEOUS IN PUBLIC and GET ON YOUR SOCIAL MEDIA FABULOUSNESS. Delete the photos of the ex (believe me, you don’t want to see them in a year). Post happy you photos. Post hopeful quotes. And appear happy, even if you have to fake it for a bit. Then, once your public profile looks good, it’s time to start looking around for new dating prospects.  Are there any interested parties that have been circling and waiting for you to be singled up? Reboot your online dating apps. Ask your friends if they know anyone great to set you up with. You don’t have to take action on anything right now.  Begin moving your intentions from wallowing to the future, now! Check out our next course!

 

  Step #9: Subtly Announce Your Singleness

If you’re nice, fun and a good person … there may be someone waiting in the wings, not even knowing that you are available! Take the opportunity to drop a hopeful, subtle hint about your being single. Share with your friends.  Ask if they know anyone good for you. Online dating is tough if you don’t have tons of time to waste – getting a referral can shortcut knowing is someone is quality or in question. And there are many, many people who are amazing who are online. Go out to dinner alone. Complete items on your bucket list. Life your life and be happy! See examples below … 

 

  Step #10: Be Open Hearted and Move On

We all hear so many stories about how to shut your heart down and protect your heart from hurt again. I’m going to say something that flies in the face of all logic. How to get over being hurt is to open your heart even wider! This logic is highly unconventional, and let’s put the past in the past and look towards our bright future (if you can dream it, you can do it). As we move into the next phase, which is preparing yourself to be “single and ready to mingle” – being open hearted is the quickest pathway to happiness!